So…You’re a Dodgers Fan

“Baseball is the coolest sport in the world. Until it’s not. And then, it’s like, super dumb. Ugh.”
-William H. Shakespeare. Probably.

Well. Here we are. Again. The dust has settled. The smoke has cleared. Our non-sports loving friends have coerced us from the ledge. We’re alive. But dang, life stinks. In a few hours, the World Series will go on without the Dodgers. It hurts. It stings. It all of the aboves. All over again.

So…you’re a Dodgers fan? Are you sure? Sigh. Me too. You’d think we’d be used to this hurt by now. I know, I know, we really shouldn’t complain too much. Some have it much worse than us…

It’s ok lil’ buddy, things will get better.
But still! Twenty-six years is a long time. Your ol’ pals here at Piazza Parlor™ were still running around in diapers the last time the Dodgers brought the trophy home. And now those orange and black buffoons are heading to their THIRD world series in SIX years. For those who can’t math, the Giants have officially gone to 50% of the last 6 World Serieseses. The world is a cruel place, isn’t it?

If you’re like me (dear lord, I hope you’re not like me), the outcome of this season has been tough to swallow for the past couple of weeks. The Dodgers getting eliminated so suddenly in the playoffs has really thrown off my routine. You see, allowing yourself to dive deep into baseball fandom definitely has its perks. For 162+ days we are never bored. Especially now with the wonderful advances in technology, we can now stay even more connected with our team thanks to the “World Wide Web.” It’s awesome! Bored at work? Check what everyone’s saying on Baseball Twitter©! Can’t wait for the game tonight? Check to see if the starting lineups have been posted? Sitting on the john? Check up on your favorite Dodgers blogs for some scalding HOT TAKES. Need to smile? Take a look on Instagram to see what crazy photo the Dodgers have taken of Juan Uribe.

Aw yeah. That’s the stuff.
But now that’s done. All gone. No more. Sure there was some big news last week (we’ll get to that in a second), but the daily amount of Dodgers happenings is no longer a thing. And it makes us feel empty inside. It’s almost like hanging out with your best friend for 162 days straight. Then, suddenly, they forget how to throw a curveball and have to go home now and…wait, that analogy sounded better in my head. It sucks man! It was a season filled with such hope and possibility, and now there is nothing but a void left in all of us (shit is getting dark).

I mean, what the heck, really? This was their second Western Division title in two years. This was a GOOD team. Flawed, sure, but a team good enough to win 94 games. A team good enough to never lose more than three games in a row. They always seemed to bounce back. A team with the greatest pitcher in all of baseball. An offensive lineup that would make me swipe right in a heartbeat if it came up on Tinder. One of the most dominant closers with one of the most beautiful pitches mine own eyes has ever seen. Seriously though. WHAT. THE. HECK.

Oh right, flaws, sure sure sure. We’re all guilty of putting that bullpen in the dark recesses of our minds when we were all jumping around and spraying imaginary champagne on our friends. The starting rotation was kind of a question mark at that point too, though that ended up being not so bad, kinda? And a manager who maybe isn’t quite the best at in-game strategy. Flaws that are relatively easy to overcome over 162 games. But in a five-game series, they become very apparent, and in this case, fatal. RIP DODGERS 😥

So why are we still here? Why do we even bother with this team that continuously finds new ways to fail in spectacular fashion? WHY DANG IT?? I suppose every year for the past 26 years we’ve found new ways to convince ourselves that these caca heads are worth our attention. But I think it’s time my friends. I think we really REALLY have something to look forward to next year. Think about it. The Dodgers have moved on from GM Ned Colletti and just hired Andrew Friedman as their President of Baseball Operations. That is good. I’m sure you’ve read more than enough about Friedman (maybe in this here ol’ blog even!), so I’ll spare you a long explanation as to why this is good. Just know, having someone who has his hands in both the analytical side of baseball, as well as the old school scouting ways may be exactly what this team needs. And also keeping Colletti away from his precious gritty veterans isn’t exactly a bad thing either.

Deal with it, Colletti.
Lest us forget about the actual team you guys! Remember, like I said earlier, this was a GOOD team! And a lot of the REALLY GOOD players are going to be here next year. HOORAY! There will be a rock solid Adrian Gonzalez, a fully healthy Matt Kemp who has returned to GOLDEN GOD mode, a (hopefully) slump free Yasiel Puig, our one and only King Uribe, a forever weird but still awesome Zack Greinke, the Ramen loving Ryu and, of course, the all-powerful savior to us all, Clayton Kershaw. Sure there are a few question marks. Hanley Ramirez? We’d love to have you back, just don’t take all the money plz. Dee Gordon or Alex Guerrero? Who knows! Joc over Crawford and Ethier? Maybe? If you ask me, those uncertainties are kind of exciting, because regardless of how those questions are answered, this is still going to be a GOOD team. Of course, we can’t talk about next year without bringing up that bullpen. But you know what? If there’s one person I would want to try to figure that out (and answer the aforementioned questions above), it’s Andrew Friedman. You got this dude.

You know, I actually don’t feel so bad anymore. Yeah sure, those other dummies from up north will be playing in the World Series blah blah whatever. When you really think about it, the future is really bright for us Dodger fans. This team that keeps letting us down is finding new ways to improve, and I just keep getting excited thinking about it. I just feel this time next year, it might finally be time to see some Dodger Blue in the Fall Classic. Things are looking good guys. Yeah…

Just wait til’ next year.


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